No worries...it seems to be a week for lack of progress all around!
I've been too tired to paint. Although Now I can afford to restock my paints. This "work" thing I've heard so much about isn't all it's cracked up to be.
that actually reminds me of something Juliana Hatfield wrote in her blog that I meant to mention to you when I was on the Cape the other 'week' ... An artist can’t have a full-time day job and be an artist. Well, he can for a while but at some point he will reach the point at which he realizes that there will never be enough hours in the day for him to fully explore and discover and develop all he needs to with his “real” work (his art). That’s why artists have and have always had patrons. The patrons understand what is at stake. An artist working full time at a day job, even if he likes that job, may never reach his full potential as an artist because life is too short. There are special cases – super-energized and -confident and -motivated freaks of nature with otherworldly metabolisms, who need only two hours of sleep per night and so can Work in full stride before and after “work.” Those people maybe can do it all. They can Work all night long and then go to “work.” Me, I like sleep too much. Without adequate sleep, I can’t Work. Or “work.” Definitely can’t do both. Most artists need time to be “idle.” “Idle” is another word for “ready” and “prepared” and “available.” Like a doctor on call. “Idle” time is time in which to wait for inspiration to strike and then flow freely. An artist must be able to jump on it at any time. The muse can be a capricious bitch-tease. We have to always wait for her. My door must always be open for her to walk through – if I go to “work” and lock the door, I may miss her when she comes. Or if she comes to visit me while I am at “work” I may have to shrug her off (“go away I love you and I need you and I so hate hate hate to do this to blow you off and I want nothing more than to sit down in some quiet spot with you and give you my undivided attention for as long as you want to be here”) because I am busy with some “work” task and I don’t want to – can’t afford to – get fired. And that may piss her off and she may then not want to come back for a long time. She may want to punish me for not being there for her. You may think Vincent Van Gogh was a bum for spending so much time painting and drinking absinthe in bars when he never had any money; for scrounging off his brother Theo who would lend Vincent money and/or send Vincent the paints and canvases that Vincent couldn’t afford. But Van Gogh wasn’t a slacker. He was the opposite; he was an insanely dedicated artist. If he had had to go to “work” every day eight hours a day and couldn’t paint all the time I think he would have lost his mind a lot sooner.
She's right. It's something I think about often. Being self-employed does help a little, though. I don't always HAVE to work. I should, though.I think I'm going to put this one away for a little bit. I've lost focus on it. I may start over. I think I might feel better working this one out on canvas rather than hardboard. I just have to buy some canvas.
and so you know why I might not be in a "rush" to become employed... now don't get me wrong!! I WANT to "work", (ie. I WANT to feel productive) but I'll be damned if I don't use this time to better the one real skill I do have.